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Having a child via surrogacy is a profound and life-changing experience. That said, for families dealing with the evils of infertility, surrogacy offers a chance to realize this dream. Moreover, surrogacy involves a woman carrying and delivering a baby for someone else, often referred to as the “intended parents.” Also, to ensure that the process is smooth, it’s essential for the intended parents to build a healthy relationship with their surrogate. In the following parts of the blog, we will shed some light on the key tips to help you establish that bond with your surrogate.
Top ways for a healthy relationship with Your Surrogate
- Start with Clear Communication
From the very beginning, it’s important to have open and clear communication with the surrogate. Moreover, before the surrogacy process starts, discuss all potential scenarios with her. For instance, what will happen if there are multiple embryos? What about the possibility of birth defects? That said, by discussing these things in advance, you’ll set clear expectations and avoid misunderstandings later during the surrogacy process.
- Respect Boundaries
When it comes to a surrogacy process, every surrogate and intended parent relationship is unique. Besides, many intended parents prefer to have a close relationship with the surrogate. At the same time, many may want to keep things more professional. Either way, it’s crucial to discuss and respect each other’s boundaries. Also, if a surrogate doesn’t want to share certain details about her personal life, the intended parents should respect her wishes, and vice versa.
- Be supportive and understanding
Intended parents must know that the surrogate is carrying a child for them. So, they must ensure the right support and understanding at every point of the surrogacy journey. Moreover, they must ensure the best care and support for not only the physical, but mental health of the surrogate as well. This way, they can let the surrogate know that she is being cared for and supported at every phase of her surrogacy journey.
- Pay a visit to the surrogate’s Appointments
If the surrogate is fine with it, the intended parents should try to pay a visit to a few of her prenatal appointments. This shows that they are concerned about the health of the surrogate during the surrogacy period. Moreover, it also allows the intended parents to be a part of her pregnancy journey.
- Celebrating Milestones Together
The pregnancy period comes with its own list of milestones and events. Also, milestones like listening to the baby’s heartbeat for the first time or finding out the baby’s gender are some unforgettable moments for everyone. That said, sharing these moments can strengthen the bond between the surrogate and intended parents.
- Stay Informed and Educated
It’s vital for intended parents to educate themselves about the surrogacy process. That said, it will help them understand what the surrogate is going through and further ensure they’re well-prepared for each stage.
- Offer the required care and support
Pregnancy can be challenging for the surrogate mother at times. So, the intended parents must offer support by checking in on the surrogate regularly. Moreover, ask if she needs anything or if there are ways you can make her more comfortable. That said, small gestures like sending a care package or simply listening can make a big difference.
- Build Trust
Trust is the foundation of any relationship and the same goes for even the surrogate and intended parents. Besides, for a surrogacy journey, it’s even more critical. Moreover, both parties are placing a lot of faith in each other. This is where trust can be built by always being honest, keeping commitments, and showing reliability.
- Plan Post-Birth Interactions
After the baby is born, the relationship between the surrogate and intended parents will evolve. So, both parties must discuss the interactions post-birth. Besides, they must ask questions like – Will the surrogate wants to receive updates on the child must be asked. That said, setting clear expectations can prevent potential awkwardness or misunderstandings later on.
- Be thankful
Intended parents must remember that surrogacy comes as a noble act. So, there is nothing bad in being thankful to their surrogate for all of her support. That said, they can pass over random ‘thank you’ cards or even a memorable gift to the surrogate.
Also, building a healthy relationship with a surrogate is quite similar to establishing a key connection with someone. That said, it requires some good communication and a feeling of trust between every party involved.
Why it is important to build a healthy relationship with the surrogate?
Becoming parents through surrogacy is a journey filled with excitement, hope, and anticipation. So, for intended parents, forming a good relationship with their surrogate is not just beneficial, but essential.
Mutual Trust and Respect
A surrogacy journey is kind of a partnership between the intended parents and the surrogate. That said, for it to be successful, trust and respect are fundamental. Moreover, when intended parents build a good relationship with their surrogate, they lay a foundation of mutual trust. Also, this trust is vital in navigating the uncertainties and challenges that may arise during the pregnancy. Besides, the surrogate needs to feel valued and respected, knowing that the intended parents are considerate of her well-being and appreciative of her contribution.
Emotional Support and Connection
Surrogacy is an emotional rollercoaster for everyone involved. That said, intended parents and surrogates share the joy of every milestone, from the first heartbeat to the baby’s movements. Also, fostering a strong emotional connection ensures that both parties can lean on each other during tough times. Moreover, they can share the joy in happy moments, making the journey more fulfilling and less stressful.
Open Communication
A good relationship is synonymous with open and honest communication. Similarly, intended parents and surrogates should be able to express their feelings, expectations, and concerns freely. Besides, regular communication helps in addressing issues promptly, while avoiding misunderstandings. Moreover, it also ensures that the surrogate’s needs are met, ultimately contributing to a healthy pregnancy.
Inclusive Decision Making
The surrogate’s involvement in decisions regarding the pregnancy is essential. Moreover, when intended parents include the surrogate in making choices about healthcare and birthing plans, it instils a sense of partnership and unity. Also, this inclusivity empowers the surrogate and enhances the relationship, creating a harmonious environment for the baby to grow.
Smooth Transition Post-Birth
A positive relationship between the intended parents and the surrogate facilitates a smoother transition after the baby’s birth. Besides, it helps in managing expectations, ensuring clarity in roles, and addressing any emotional challenges that might arise during the handover. This is where maintaining this connection post-birth can also be rewarding, as it lays the foundation for a continued friendship.
Legal and Ethical Considerations
A good relationship with the surrogate helps in navigating the legal and ethical aspects of surrogacy more smoothly. Moreover, it ensures that all parties are on the same page regarding agreements, thereby avoiding conflicts. Besides, it ensures the surrogate’s rights are respected, and the intended parents’ interests are protected.
Better Well-being of the Child
The child’s well-being is the central focus of any surrogacy procedure. Besides, a harmonious relationship between the surrogate and intended parents contributes to a positive prenatal environment. Also, it impacts the child’s development positively. On the other hand, the child can also benefit from understanding the surrogacy story post-birth, knowing that it was built on respect, love, and cooperation.
Final words
Building a good relationship with a surrogate is crucial for intended parents in many aspects. Moreover, it establishes mutual trust and respect, fosters emotional support, ensures open communication, and encourages inclusive decision-making. Besides, it also facilitates a smoother transition post-birth, aids in navigating legal and ethical considerations, and significantly contributes to the child’s well-being. This is where by investing time and effort in building this relationship, intended parents and surrogates can ensure a more joyful, harmonious, and rewarding surrogacy journey. Gaia Fertility always supports you on this whole process of parenthood.
